Conflicts can be constructive or destructive and it mainly depends upon the way they are handled. They are natural and inevitable and the skill to resolve them is really an art and most valued one by the employers. Every organization should have a team of experts to sort out workplace conflicts in an effective and amicable way. Any relationship be it professional, personal, or business is well balanced and maintained by effective communication, empathetic listening, and optimism. Now, let us discuss the basic skills needed to handle a conflict in a successful way.
Open communication-
One of the foremost skills required in resolving a conflict is communication skills. Poor or lack of communication is the root cause of any misunderstanding. To evade this, one should be honest enough to identify the root cause of the problem and then investigate further. A sensible straightforward communication in a respectful way without hurting the sentiments of others is vital. Communication in an organization must be complete and capable of getting the right response from the receiver. It is always better to give an opportunity to let others speak and know what their perception is and what is expected of you. A two-way communication is the best approach to foster a healthy relationship. Better understanding is enhanced through communication and prevents escalation of a conflict to a higher level. A polite approach is considered and hence be careful about the tone and pitch while interacting with others. Think twice before you speak and see that the words you utter are relevant and effective to solve the conflict at hand.
Active listening-
Listening is a skill which is often undervalued or overlooked in communication. It is vital to understand the fact that active listening is the key to gain understanding between the parties involved in a conflict. Recently, it has been recognized that it is an important tool used in mediation and arbitration. Active listening should be done without interruption and unwelcomed advice should be avoided. When you pay attention to the words spoken by the speaker you express a sensitivity towards his emotions. This respect and concern shown could relieve the person of his stress and later on will intend to compromise anything for the sake of the listener. It would encourage them to come up with more opinion of theirs or any related information. Active listening validates or acknowledges the perception of the other person and it does not mean that it should be accepted always. This lays the foundation to earn the trust of the concerned party which is otherwise difficult to earn. Listen, just listen for the sake of understanding a person and not to advise him or to defend yourself. Listening should be done with an open mind to obtain and absorb complete information from the other person which is essential in resolving conflicts.
Empathy-
Empathy is the ability to understand others’ emotions and feelings by placing oneself in others shoes. This also includes the desire to help one and the concern or caring attitude for the other person. An empathetic feeling goes a long way in this world to create a path in bringing astounding results in conflict resolution. Empathy in our day-to-day life reflects a respectful understanding of others’ feelings and this is important in any genuine relationship. Empathy is not a skill, that is taught in a classroom, but an innate quality that helps in bridging the gap between two people. Empathy should be executed judiciously and should facilitate in mitigating the conflict. An empathetic listening enhances communication and efficiency, thus building a congenial and positive environment.
Optimism-
Optimism is the art of trying to find out the feasible solution for any problem. In this, every hidden hurdle and obstacle is seen as an opportunity to grow. It helps in bringing a sense of friendly and promising atmosphere. An optimistic approach will give us an objective outlook of the issue at hand while pessimism observes it as a permanent or a long lasting one. Optimism gives us the energy to navigate through the perils of misunderstanding and focus on the outcome of the endeavour. This reflects one’s personality and is acquired from the social environment of the person.
Attention to nonverbal cues-
In oral communication 70% of the message is conveyed through non-verbal communication, which includes body language like facial expressions and voice modulation like tone, volume, pitch etc. People involved in a conflict express themselves not only with words but more with the expressions they use. Hence, to get to the root of the problem, it is essential to pay attention to the unspoken words or the wordless clues amidst the argument. Keenly observing the body language of a person in conflict will help in comprehending the situation quickly and equating a solution before it escalates to a higher level. Usually, non-verbal communication is more reliable than verbal communication, as it is emotionally driven and speaks the heart of a person.
Emotional intelligence of a person helps us understand the non-verbal signals better, thus enhancing the chances of resolving conflicts.
Poise demeanor-
Self-awareness or identifying one’s ingrained style in handling a conflict is vital to access the problem at hand. An open mind communication keeps us poised and enable us to achieve a collaborative solution. A calm mind looks for ways to create a common platform for arriving at a consensus. Poise demeanor has emotional control and takes accountability of the situation and attempts to provide a solution that bests suits all. Clear and calm mind will enable us to understand the core reason of the conflict while a clouded mind blocks the cognitive skill from identifying the cause of issue. Handling controversial issues in a rational way with poise and confidence speeds up the desired result.
Willingness to compromise-
Compromise is an attempt to bring about a balanced solution to both the parties and this really need a lot of people skills. This is the most used technique in arbitration and negotiation. Compromise does not bring an end to the existing problem completely particularly the emotional aspects as it focuses on the tangible things than the intangible feelings. Here the ill feelings of one or both the parties linger on and there are chances for it to erupt at some point later. This could be adopted only when both the parties involved in a conflict are ready and willing to compromise as it becomes difficult for them to get the desired result. A conscious effort is required to resolve a conflict as both the parties are required to give up something to arrive at a mutually acceptable solution.
Value the relationship-
Disagreements or conflicts can happen in any relationship and it depends upon the parties involved to decide how they handle the situation. If there is a problem in discussing certain sensitive issue then definitely it is understood that the relationship is not on a healthy track. Maintaining a polite language and trying to get to the root of the problem in an objective way is encouraged. Either of the conflicting party should not try to dominate the other and instead should try finding a common ground to sort out the issue. Any relationship should be supportive morally and emotionally and this could be possible only when both the people see eye-to-eye on the bigger picture or near future goals. While in a conflict try to have an open conversation and don’t except the opponent to read your mind. Attempting to resolve a conflict with compassion and understanding, evaluating the value of relationship is a sound and wise practice.
Focus on the issue at hand-
Discussions done to resolve a conflict should be objective focusing on the issue at hand rather than digging into the past trash. When under stress or in the middle of a heated argument one should take a deep breath and avoid reacting emotionally which might make things worse. If the situation or the conflict is in such a way that it has brought about a complete halt in the activities, it would be better to sort it out instead of ignoring it and later complicating the things.
Creativity and humour-
Conflicts usually bring about a rift in any relationship, be it personal or professional. Laughter relieves stress and lighten the mood even under stressful situations and brings back people to their form and work. Humour is an effective tool to overcome awkward situations and brings excitement and a sense of connection among people. A smile is contagious and when you just smile, instantly the person opposite to you will also exchange the same. This helps in reducing the stress level and smoothens the differences in a relationship. Creativity is the art of thinking out of the box, which demands expertise. Instead of thinking about a routine solution, implementing a creative one, after a thorough analysis of the pros and cons may bring about a better solution and put things into perspective.